Well, it’s now official. I’ve been accepted into the M. Div. program at Beeson Divinity School for the Spring ‘08 semester. I had a pretty good feeling that I would get in, but it’s good to finally know for sure where I will be in two months, barring some massive unforseen event which would hinder me from going. For those of who who don’t know, Beeson is a part of Samford University in Birmingham, Alabama. The plan at this point is that I will be there for approximately 4 years to finish the program. I also recieved the base scholarship, which covers a little less than half the tuition, which I also expected would happen. I wouldn’t have even applied if I knew I wouldn’t get any kind of scholarship help. The thing that I didn’t expect was this: They are awarding me an extra $1,000 on my first bill to cover my moving costs to Birmingham! I didn’t think schools did that; but I was very grateful and surprised. I was beginning to cringe at what it would cost me just to move that far. So the next chapter for me seems to be in place. I’m sure most if not all of you would agree that it would be a good thing for me to go to seminary. It’s not for everyone, but I feel that it’s something I should do if I can, and I can at this stage in life, so I am!

The rest of this entry has little to do with Uganda, just to warn you. 

But let me share with you some of the reasons I am going to seminary. There are good and bad reasons to do just about anything, including the training I am in for. But here are the reasons I am going to seminary, and going to this particular school.

1. It’s been my plan since I was 19 years old. This is not a very good reason to go, but it’s part of it. Before I left to attend Moody Bible Institute in ‘02 I was completing an internship at my home church, Fox Valley Bible Church. During that time, two ministry passions rose to the surface, and both passions emerged from a general “calling” I felt to serve God in vocational ministry. This was not TO any specific place or people group, but just what I felt God was moving me toward. One of the passions was music ministry. I loved, and still love, to lead God’s people in true, heartfelt worship. I have grown a lot in this area since then. But the other passion was to preach/teach and disciple. I was very inexperienced at this, but felt that it was something God was perhaps gearing me for. So the question was, should I major in music or in more of a Biblical/theological/pastor major? After much prayer and counsel, I decided to be a music major at Moody(which I am glad I did), and end my official music education there. But I would have to go on to seminary to pursue more biblical/theological/pastoral studies. So I’m still on this track, and these two passions have developed more, and have become more intense for me.

2. Because of the need out there. I feel that the tools I will pick up from this type of education will help in God’s Kingdom. I believe in a learned clergy. This does not mean that all pastors need formal training; for many, especially outside the U.S., this is simply not possible. But I believe that all pastors should be disciplined and rigorous in their study and exposure to the Word of God, and should use whatever resources they have at their disposal. The reason for this is so that one may, as much as possible, “handle accurately the Word of truth”, and know how to properly wield the sword called the Bible. And the reason we must wield this weapon accurately is because through the clear proclamation of it the Spirit of God will be at work as He wills, lives will be changed, the dead will hear and be raised, and the sleepers will receive an electric shock. I believe that it is the Spirit of God/the Word of God that will transform oppressed people and cultures in Africa, and will have the power to cause the richest man in America to give away everything he has for the Kingdom.

3. Because I want to. That’s another beautiful thing about this. I’m really looking forward to better reading my bible in Greek and Hebrew, to plumb the depths of the Bible, to fellowship with other like-minded men, to face the challenges to my mind and heart, to be discipled, to know Christ more, to have my passion for God’s mission on this earth fueled more and more. I really have a hunger for this, and that contributes to my reasons for wanting to go. I know that there will be times when I wish I hadn’t gone, but that’s all part of it, and I’m confident I’ll pull through, if He wills and enables it. Someone once said, regarding finding God’s will, “Just love God, and do what you want.”

4. Because I need to. I need more preparation both in my mind and heart for what God is preparing me for. I have a hazy idea of what that will be, but I feel that I need this preparation. It will not be a waste, no matter what happens afterward. But I have a strong sense that I need to have more time of preparation before diving right in, which I’ve been tempted to do more than once. Sometimes I think of Spurgeon, who was shepherding a huge church while still a teenager, and wonder, “What am I waiting for?” Then I remember that I am not Spurgeon. I am encouraged by many other great men of God who have spent a good deal of their life in preparation before beginning their primary ministry. That did not mean that they did no ministry during that time; life was ministry to them in whatever form that took, and this will be true for me. I’m excited about the ministry opportunities in Birmingham. Jesus was 30 years old when he began. I’ll be getting close to that by the time I finish school. I also know that I’m not Jesus, but you get the point!

I’m sure there are more reasons I’m not remembering right now. Chambers had a saying: “Trust God, and do the next thing.” That’s good advice, and that’s what I’m doing. A lot can happen in the next few years, but all I can see at this point is the “next thing”.

On to some things that have happened this week. Something big actually did take place here at New Hope. One of the “sons of New Hope” died suddenly of a blood clot that reached his heart. He was around 21 years old. He had grown up here, and was one of, if not THE best guy that has been produced here. Very godly, responsible, headed in a great direction. I heard that if anyone was going to be put in a place to really change Uganda, he was the guy. God took him out, leaving a lot of real hurt and pain and questions. I won’t go into detail on all of that, but the past few days have been very somber, as it really hit the community here very hard. It was a massive kick in the gut. His mother had died a number of years ago, so this family has already suffered a good deal. He was the firstborn son of their family. So I’ve been experiencing a community in heavy grieving over this. Things have moved on outwardly, but it will take some time for a lot of the people to get over this.

Two weeks from Tuesday of this week the Institute will be over. How it has flown by! I can’t believe my time here is coming to an end. Please pray for me as I try to seal in cement the things I have learned here. For my last two entries to come I will write about the top things I’ve learned since coming here. I’m grateful to you all for your prayers, whoever is still reading this blog! Please pray as I come to the end, and pray as I come home and experience the West through different eyes.

This week was a pretty standard week, nothing really out of the ordinary except for the foreign staff retreat. We left on Thursday morning and arrived that afternoon at a resort in the town of Jinja near the Nile River. It’s the seem place I went to about a month or so ago to go rafting. It was a time for all of the Western staff members and their families to get away and relax a bit, as well as to discuss difficulties and issues that face westerners in a unique way. I was asked to come along and lead our worship times, but the time there proved to be profoundly informative for me. The rest of this entry will consist of some reflections based on things I took away from this time.

In my head I have a list of things it will cost to serve God’s cause overseas in missions. Yes, you have to leave your land, friends, comforts, etc. One thing on that list is culture. I had previously not thought of this as a very big deal, but after this retreat I am realizing that it is probably the hardest thing to deal with on the mission field. You are forced to give up a lot of your culture and adjust to another culture. I don’t think I really yet understand this from an experiential perspective, but having heard these missionaries express some of their difficulties in this area I feel I have a better grasp on the matter. But why is this so hard? What are the difficulties that attend living in a different culture? I think the answer will be different depending on which culture you are leaving and to which culture you are going. But going from an American/British cultural to a third-world culture like the Ugandan bush, the clash of cultures is pronounced. Let me give some examples. Some of these I have experienced, and others can only be experienced by living here with a family for a more exteneded period of time.

The other day I was taking a nap on a hot afternoon, a siesta if you will. I heard a knock at the door. I thought in my head, “If I don’t answer, they will go away. I’m NOT HERE right now…I’m taking a nap, and it can wait.” In the States, if you knock and no one answers, you assume that they are either not home, or are busy and are choosing not to answer. Either way, you just leave and try again later. But this is not the States. The next thing I know the front door opens, and a stranger to me walks right into the room where I’m trying to sleep! He acted surprised, and asked me if Matthew(roomate) was here. He’s just walked through the house, so he knows he’s not there. But I said no, he’s off doing something else right now. He said thanks, and left. I was a bit shocked at this. I asked Matthew about it later, and he said that it was a fairly normal thing for good friends, whom this guy was to Matthew, a college classmate.

In America, when someone knocks on the door and you answer, you ask them what they have come for. Often you may invite them in, but usually they have some business with you if they show up for an unplanned, unannounced visit. They will not assume that you will invite them in. In fact, you don’t want to bother people, because they may have been busy, or in the middle of something important. It’s the exact opposite in Uganda. When they come to the door, you invite them in. You don’t ask them why they have come, especially when they are standing on your porch. It is quite rude to do so. You invite them in for a visit. They have come for relationship. If they have come just before dinner, you feed them. There doesn’t seem to be much concern for what you were busy doing, and it gets put on hold for an indefinite amount of time. Can you see how this might be hard for a Westerner to adjust to day after day, year after year? I actually like the practice of inviting people in, having an open-door policy. But there are times when I think I would just need to be alone, or just do my work in privacy. Privacy is non-existent for many here, especially in a community living environment like New Hope Uganda. It is a HIGHLY valued thing in the West. It’s not a big deal here.

A few other difficulties. The roads here are astoundingly awful. In the States many of them would simply be blocked off. On the way to the retreat we passed four or five large trucks that had tipped over and were laying on their side. The electricity is sporratic. At meetings there is a tedious formality, even for small things. People are generally always late for everything. There are donkeys that wake up everyone within a quarter mile at 5 am. Chickens are running everywhere, getting into gardens and even some houses, dropping their business. When you leave New Hope everyone is staring at you because you are white, a “mizungu” as they say. When you go into town to buy supplies people are constantly scamming you and raising their prices a few notches because they think all whites are rich, and they want a piece of it. A lot of the kids gossip and falsely slander the western staff. Some of the MK’s get teased and jokingly threatened by adults just to get a rise out of them. The whole mindset of the culture is so different, and often I myself just cannot understand or believe certain things go on, and are OK with the culture.

These are only a few things on the list. Imagine living here with your family for ten years. It will wear on you over time. It can really be a wearying thing. Yet every missionary who accepts the call to serve God’s kingdom in a different culture accepts the unknown, and knows that these things will be there. The cultural shift will be difficult. Some missionaries just burn out after a few years of this. Others endure it, and find a way to deal with it. Yet what I saw at this retreat was that everyone there has difficulties with these things, and a lot of adjustment is required, but they are all still here, still in God’s will, and are happy. They have found a way to deal with it, and everyone must find their own way to deal with it. I used to not understand why missionaries took furloughs, but now I can see why it would be helpful. To get back into the culture you know can mentally be a great refreshment.

These cultural difficulties are by no means a reason to leave the mission field, unless of course one fails to properly deal with it, or has false expectations, like hoping to change the culture. Some of the early missionaries tried to do this, and it caused a lot of harm to Christianity for generations. The gospel is not for one culture, and it’s not cultureless, but it is full of every culture, every tongue, tribe, people and nation. These are things I’m still just beginning to understand. But I do know that God provides the grace needed to carry out his mission whether the mission is to a western affluent society, a persecuted underground church Islamic society, or a war-torn, very different African society. It’s vital that we adjust to the culture we are placed it, and be strategic and creative about how to preach the gospel in such a way that it will speak to that culture, that the true gospel will come out with all it’s fullness and power. It will look a bit different than in the West, but it’s the same truth, the same faith. And by the way, our American culture is changing too. We must find a way to preach the gospel in such a way that it remains rooted in the Word, rooted in historic Christianity, yet cuts to the heart of the 21st century American, and tears down the false worldview and relativistic epistomology.

Finally, I would encourage you to pray for your missionaries in one new way, that is, to pray that they might stand firm in their different culture. Pray that they would have true rest in the midst of it. Pray that through their struggle the gospel might shine more brightly. Pray that they themselves would be sanctified more and more through these difficulties, and that culture-transcending, humanity-transforming, God-glorifying gospel would come out clearly.

I apologize to those of you who checked the blog on Monday for the regular update, and found only last week’s blog entry. I’ve been a little busy lately, and I completely spaced on Monday regarding the blog, and didn’t remember until about 11:00 at night. I didn’t really know what to write about, to be honest, but I was faced with something very interesting today, an issue I have thought about before, but have never really dealt with it very much. Before I get into that issue, I will tell you what’s been happening here with me.

Things are going along pretty normally. There are small issues here and there, but nothing worth writing home about, so I won’t. In class we learned about Christian education, being that there is a well-developed Christian school on site. Much of it was pretty straight forward, but not particularly challenging to me personally, to be honest. I can’t believe I’m coming home in a little over four weeks! It’s going to be strange being back in the States. I’ve sort of become used to living here, and it’s strange to think of going back. I will be glad to be home, mind you, but it will be a bit strange at first, I think. I’ve been totally out of the loop on current events, especially on the REALLY important things, like the Cubs or the Bears (Chicago sports teams, not the animals). I hear things at times, but the seasons have moved along and will end before I know it. If anyone knows of current events I should know about, leave me a comment! (Except if Hillary is up in the polls- I don’t want to hear that.)

Tuesday and Wednesday of this week have been/will be unique days. A parachurch organization called CHE(Christian Holistic Empowerment), which exists in many countries including Uganda, came to do a presentation for the Institute and a lot of the staff. Their vision is to partner with local churches, particularly in third-world countries, and minister with them in a more holistic ministry to the whole person- physically and spiritually. They seek to promote health, get people out of poverty not by handouts(which ironically has been a powerful agent in crippling much of Africa’s economy) but by teaching people how to live, and using all of this as a means to bring in the gospel.

I really don’t have anything bad to say about this group. From what I have seen so far they are on the right track, in my opinion. Poverty, as you know, is a real problem in Uganda. Many of the small village church pastors really struggle to get their people out of a poverty mindset. People grow crops and get just enough to live on, and it never occurs to them to try to get out of that kind of living. The West has tried to fix the situation by giving handouts, but this merely takes away responsibility and ownership, and in the end leaves people worse off than before. What they need is people to go in and teach these people basic things like cleanliness, sanitation, first aid, how to multiply your crops and money, how to raise cattle and fish, etc. This takes time and attention. I like that this group emphasises the local church, and goes so far as to say that there is no hope without the local church. They seek to minister the physical, long-term needs of people, as well as the spiritual.

Yet what is the goal of all of this physical ministry? It’s easy to explain why we should preach the gospel and do discipleship. But why the ministry to the physical? Some people say that it is a MEANS to spiritual transformation, that by showing them the love of Christ a door is open to explain the gospel. This is basically what I heard from this parachurch group. The other extreme is that it’s basically pointless to minister to the physical needs of people, because they are going to die and spend eternity in hell if we don’t just give them gospel. So don’t waste your time on those other things. This second approach is easy to refute, based on a host of Old and New Testament passages which talk about helping widows, orphans, remembering the poor, doing it “unto the least of these”, visiting those in prison, etc. Yet I think many Christians believe that physical ministry is secondary to gospel ministry. There is a dichotomy between gospel ministry of the Word, and meeting physical needs, between the great commandment and the great commission. Most honest, Bible-believing Christians I think would agree that yes, we need to meet people’s physical needs, but it’s only a means to giving them the gospel, which is the first approach stated above.

This is certainly true, yet I think there is a deeper, richer foundation for the meeting of physical needs, and it is in no way separated from real gospel ministry. It goes hand in hand with what God seeks to accomplish through the gospel, and we must not separate the two. Physical needs ministry is just as gospel centered and necessary as spiritual needs ministry, and we want to have a Biblical perspective on the matter which, I believe, expresses this more holistic view.

The churches here in the villages are very poor. It’s not like a lot of our American churches that have money set aside in case a homeless man comes to their church seeking food, or if a family can’t afford to fix their car or something. Here everyone is in poverty, and so a vital, key, frontline ministry for every church here should include a strategic ministry to the impoverished people.

But why exactly? Let’s take a step back and ask this: Why should we as Christians meet physical needs at all? There is a deep sense in us that we should, which is good, but why? I think that when we can articulate why, we will have a much greater drive and motivation to carry out God’s ministry to the the world in need.

The answer, I believe, is rooted in our role as God’s image-bearing, vice-regents on the earth. When God created mankind, He created us in His image, and we were given the charge to rule the earth. One primary aspect of this image of God includes our purpose on this earth, which is to rule and live in it under God rule, with the charge to rule it as he would, as his representatives. When man decided to get out from under God’s good rule, that image-bearing role was severely marred, and we became virtually incapable of bearing this image. The image was still there, but it was a dead image, needing resurrection. The man was cursed, as was the whole earth. Hate, murder, pride, vanity, lust, greed, lies, and rebellion became the dominant traits on the earth, all of which can lead to the war and poverty which we see today. Perhaps the poverty might not come about until generations later, but it did come.

In Christ we see the true image of God. Jesus perfectly modeled for us what it means to reflect God’s image. He was the perfect image of God, the true man. He showed us what it means to be truly human, in an unfallen state. He perfectly exemplified love in his life and death. Yet he did not just preach and teach. He healed the sick, caused the blind to see, and raised the dead. He felt compassion for the crowds, and fed them, both physically(feeding 5,000), and spiritually (I am the bread of life).

In Christ, the image of God is restored, and this image is being made new in us. We are in the process of transformation. We are beginning, right NOW, to live out the new creation, which has broken in to the present day, these last days. It has begun in the church, and will one day be consummated finally. 2 Cor. 5:17- “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, the new has come.” We are now able to be true humans, and Christ has shown us how to live as true humans. He has also enabled us to be this way by his work on the cross and resurrection from the dead. We can begin to clearly reflect His glory to this earth, and once again rule the earth as He intended us to do it, to govern it under His rule as He would rule it. We are His redeemed representatives.

I know I’ve stated this truth quickly and not very completely, it has vast implications for the church’s impact on the world. It means that we should seek to redeem our culture and world through the gospel. So in this African context, the goal should be redeem people in Christ from the inside out. I think there are two angles from which we can come from in ministering to physical needs. First, we should minister to others because of who we are as image bearing, glory-reflecting people. We want to show God’s love to people by doing what Jesus did on the earth, simply because it puts God’s glory on display, which God delights in. We demonstrate the love of God. Those who fail to show this kind of love in physical ministry to others make it evident that they do not belong to God. This is seen the story of the sheep and goats in Matthew 25:31ff. “The he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you crused, into the eternal fire prepared for the devila nd his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did no welcome me, nake and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ ” Jesus goes on to say that when you did not do it unto the least of these, you did not do it unto me.

I mentioned above that there were two reasons, but I guess there is just one. Our ministry is reflection of God, and a reflection of who we are in him. To ask the question presented in the title of this blog, should I help the poor, of preach the gospel? The answer of course, is both. In helping the poor were are preaching the gospel. Helping the poor is a great part of gospel ministry. It’s like asking if we should live out what we believe, or just talk about it. We want to stay away on the one side from the extreme that says we should just help the poor because of our compassion for them, which is humanitarian and good, but it’s not the essence of the gospel. We must not lose sight of the gospel! Keep it central! We must also stay away from the other extreme which says we should just preach the gospel, and leave the physical ministry up to others who enjoy that kind of thing. If we go to either extreme we fail to clearly reflect the gospel, and fail to fully live out our purpose on this earth.

I hope this has been food for thought. It faces all of us in one way or another every day. I’m very challenged by this. It’s so easy to lose sight of the big picture of what God is doing on this earth. I need to remind myself of it every day, so I don’t get lost in the trees. Please leave me a comment if you disagree with anything I’ve said here, or would like to add to it. I welcome your input.

I will be leading worship this Thursday through Saturday for a staff retreat here. It’s for the foreign staff, which means it’s ok to sing songs with lots of words and content, which will be nice. Pray that it would be a spiritually(and physically!) refreshing time for all, and that affections would be highly raised.

Grace and peace. 

For this week’s entry I would like to talk about an issue that is near and dear to my heart. Those of you who know me know that one of my strong desires is to see God more glorified in the corporate worship of His people, the church. During my time here I have been evaluating some of the chuches I have been to, and trying to reconcile some of the practices. I’ve tried to decide why I’m bothered. Is it cultural difference, or is there real room for improvement? The answer, or course, is both. I have many thoughts on this issue, but I will first update you all on what is happening in my life in this little pocket of Uganda.

I have exhausted all of my easy reading books which I brought with me. The only ones left are The Works of Edwards and another book on postmodern hermeneutics which I felt motivated to bring with. Both are huge books, and are guaranteed to last me until I get home and beyond. But I often don’t have the mental energy to take on such books, so I am borrowing a lot of books from Keith. Right now I’m reading The Holiness of God, by Sproul. It’s a great, refreshing, challenging book. A staple for Christian reading. I’m also reading another strange fictional book which I won’t mention here. I find that I have a lot of time these days, more than before. I read and write a lot. My relationship with a few of the older guys in my family group is really getting good and familial, and I’m able to give more and more solid input into their lives. My only regret is that I’m leaving in 5-6 weeks, and will become yet another person who has come in, stayed for a bit, then left. So many people leave. There’s really not much I can do about this though.

In class we are learning about Christian education, sort of going through a philosophy of Christian teaching. We’ve had some good conversations so far. This Tuesday we have no class due to the Ugandan independence day. Next week is the foreign staff retreat for New Hope. It will be all westerners I believe, from the States and from the U.K. We’ll be away for 3 days, and I’ve been asked to lead worship for it. I’m very excited about it. I get the feeling that often the Westerners are not as “fed” as they perhaps would like to be by the corporate singing worship each Sunday, so I’m praying that God would use this time to refresh their hearts and enliven holy affections. The director’s son, Jeremiah, will be playing djembe with me. He’s only about 10 years old, and is a bit insecure I think. But he capable of holding his own, and it will be a good time for him to learn and grow in this area as I work with him.

Here’s a prayer item which has me slightly vexed. As many of you know, I plan on attending seminary in January. I had finally chosen which one I wanted to go to, and I am supposed to find out soon whether or not I got in. Getting in to the school by itself is not the thing that I’m concerned about. I’m concerned because if I don’t get it, I have no plan B. I have no backup seminary because I decided on THIS particular one, and excluded the rest. I’m not quite sure what I’ll do if I don’t get in. I may get in very easily, and have nothing to worry about. I really don’t know. The thing I really don’t want is to sit around and wait. I’ve been out of school for two years now, and I really desire to know and grow more in that setting.  I should find out in the next two weeks what I’m going to do, and I’ll let you all know what happens.

Now for the issue mentioned above. Let me first explain the situation the way I’m seeing it, then I will propose a few possible ways we may be able to improve upon it. This may sound funny to you that I think this way, and I know it’s not as clear cut as “problem-solution”, but it helps to think through the issue. I know it also sounds incredibly presumptuous for me to offer solutions to the problem, so let me just say I probably don’t see things exactly as they are, and I know I’m not thinking of every issue this relates to. I’m a Westerner, an outsider. I’m writing this so that all of you in the States are privy to what I’m learning and thinking through these days. Feel free to offer your critiques when I’m finished.

It’s difficult to identify the root issue of the problem, so let me share a few symptoms to give you an idea. I’m disheartened and disturbed by something I see in our corporate worship. This is not true in every church here- this is a generality. Some of my concerns are Western concerns, and others are what I feel are biblical concerns. Some concerns arise from the fact that I’ve led worship so much, and can’t help but be a bit critical. I’m just trying to understand it. Here are some things that stick out to me. Musically, I don’t see any real beauty or musicality. We use a fake, synthesized drum set. We use a synthesized keyboard sound. The chord selection rarely gets beyond the I, the IV, and the V(don’t worry about it if you don’t know what this means). There are others, but these aren’t the most important thing. You can still have wonderful, God-honoring worship with sub-par music. It’s not about that. It’s only a problem to me when the drum beat sounds like I’m at a circus, and the music starts to communicate something other than the words are communicating.

Content. The content is usually pretty shallow and repetitive. There are certainly a few good songs in there. I crave for these on Sunday morning. I’m not asking them to be like the West. I don’t think content is a Western thing. It’s a Bible thing- it’s a huge book full of meaningful content. Yet most people seem content to dwell on a phrase over and over and over. Which leads to another issue: affectation. Affectation is when you seek to get people excited, and get their emotions/affections raised using something other than the object of the affections itself. That’s my underdeveloped definition. The best example of this would be to use excessive volume or repitition to get people excited in their worship. That becomes an end in itself. This is quite common everywhere. I believe there is a place for repetition, and I believe with all my heart that our affections need to be raised when we come before God in worship. But what are we raising the affections with? Jonathan Edwards put it this way: “I desire to raise the affections of my hearers as high as I possibly can, provided they are affected with nothing but the truth…”

A few other things. It’s only a slight exaggeration to say that everyone is always late. This is a cultural thing. But it can easily become a lazy thing, and therefore a sin thing. Nevermind that half the congregation doesn’t arrive until 20 minutes into the service. I played guitar this past Sunday for the first time. We were NOT ready. The leader was not familiar with the music. We got started an hour late the day before to practice, and I had to leave. The next morning when I thought we would rehearse, we did about 5 minutes of run-through, and that was it. Now I was not terribly disturbed about this, being an outsider, an observer. But it’s another piece of the puzzle.

Do you get the picture? So WHY are things this way? Let me say first of all that the church has come a LONG way in the past few years. They are making great strides forward as a church, and the leadership has really been getting their act together. I know they are doing all they can right now, and I don’t fault them in the slightest. I don’t fault anyone in fact. People are products of their culture, and what were seeing is the culture reflected in the church. People like the electronic drums because it represents development and technology. Perhaps the reason there is so little content is because people aren’t used to reading much, and perhaps aren’t used to taking in big thoughts and pieces of information. Some are totally illiterate. People are late for church, late for practice, because that’s the culture. It’s REALLY hard to change things like that which are so engrained in people.

Now perhaps you are saying to yourself, “What is his problem? Why is he thinking about this so much?” It’s the same reason why we work hard at preaching, or teaching, or doing anything in life as Christians: God must be glorified. I want to see Him glorified MORE. I’m not questioning the hearts of these people. Their hearts are good, I think. I can’t speak to that. But the big thought that is going through my head on Sunday morning is this: If only they knew how good it could be. If only they could experience what it’s like to have your mind and heart fully engaged in great expectation Sunday after Sunday. I think many of them just don’t realize the feast that could be theirs. I could be wrong about this. But that’s my heart. I want them to know, to see, to think and feel.

Now if I encountered this situation in America, and was told to go in and change it, it would be difficult, but very possible. I think I know how I would attempt to go about it. You cast a biblical, God-saturated vision for worship in the church, shepherd your people over time, provide solid leadership to your worship team, and bathe it all in prayer. That’s the simplistic version. I know it’s not quite that clear cut. But in Africa there are worldview and cultural barriers which are not easy to change, and if you do it wrongly, you can step on more than people’s toes.

In talking with a few of the missionaries here, what seems to be needed is a good leader who can shepherd that ministry long-term. Many people blow in and out, like me, and can offer bits of help. But a good musical, pastoral leader is needed for this, and I think it needs to be a Ugandan. A Westerner may be able to train such a person, but someone in the culture I think needs to spearhead such a thing. There seems to be a lack of vision for the ministry due to a lack of a vision-casting leader who will take the bull by the horns and stick with it.

Let me be clear: I love the Church. My heart is there. I’m not being critical to be critical, but because I want God to be seen and savored there. I want them to feast as I have.

I can get hopeless when I think about big and wide the problem stretches, and what kind of challenges face the Ugandan church. All the more reason to have pastors who can really teach their people well, and shepherd them Biblically. All the more reason to have people come and train pastors here. Since God relates to everything and everything to God, the problems in Uganda are theological problems, requiring theological solutions at the root. All that means is that the Holy Spirit is desperately needed to open eyes to God and His truth, and to sanctify people.

I’m proud of you if you made it this far in the blog entry. You are probably more confused than ever. I know I am. If you’re still unclear, come over here and see for yourself! Why not? My desire for the church is that she would be a pure, spotless bride before Christ. That we would present every person complete in Christ. To labor for the joy of the peoples. I want them to know God more, to worship Him in spirit and in truth. God is seeking such worshippers, and may more true worshippers be born as we proclaim God’s truth. I resonate with the cry of the Psalmist: “May the peoples praise You O God! May all the peoples praise You!”

This question stems from some discouragement I was dealing with a couple of weeks ago. You could probably sense some of the struggle in my last entry. Let me first tell you what exactly the struggle was, then I will tell you how I’ve gotten out of it. In the midst of this I hope you will be encouraged when you encounter such situations, as they are pretty much guaranteed for any Christian who does the smallest amount of ministry or who cares even a little bit about those whom he/she ministers to.

The question I struggled with was this: What am I supposed to do or think when I work hard in my ministry, and see zero results for my efforts? This question was not merely theoretical. It was experiential. I know the answer to the question in my head, but there was a wall in place when it came to grasping and experiencing it in my heart and affections. You see, I was discouraged with my efforts here in Uganda, most specifically with the kids I have developed relationships with in my family group. Now I know I am not here to produce any radical change. God can do that if he wishes. But the real ministry impact belongs to the people who spend their years pouring into these kids, laboring for the long haul. But my hope is that God might use me in a small way, as God has used people in my past whom I only had a chance to know for maybe a week or a month.

I think a few factors were converging to bring me to this point. The first factor is a feeling of restlesness in doing ministry. I do a lot of things here, but a lot of it is not “ministry” in the official sense. I worked part-time at a church before coming to Uganda. I led a ministry. I established relationships poured into some people. Yet here the ministry is much less formal. My heart longs to labor harder for God’s Kingdom, and to DO things, to undertake projects and advancements for God. But this is not the place nor the time for anything big like that. It will come, and I need to be patient. I know God is working on my heart here, big time. I think this is at least one of the primary reasons God brought me here. My work is to let Him work on my heart, to work out my salvation with fear and trembling, as He accomplished His work and will in me.

The second factor is a lack of apparent results in one of the only outward ministries I have here, which I am becoming more convinced is yet another way that God is working on my heart. The ministry is with the kids in my family group. I came to realize a while ago that I can’t possibly seek to disciple everyone, or closely impact everyone. So I picked three guys to meet with. Yet I failed to realize a key piece to the puzzle in a situation like this: Do they want this? I realized that they don’t want to sit and drink in the Word, drink in the weighty matters of God as I would. They just aren’t ready yet. So I decided to just start BEING with them, having fun with them, and let the conversations go where they will. Anyhow, I began to despair of any change in their hearts and lives. I thought they had too much past baggage, and they are too anesthetised to the things of God for it to make an impact. On a deeper level, I despair of God bringing any real sanctifying change in their lives.

I believe God brought me to this point for a reason, and that reason was so that I would despair of any fruit coming from MY efforts, and learn to trust Him wholly for the results. That way He is more glorified. I’ve felt this way often when it comes to evangelism. So what should we do? Should we stop evangelizing and just focus inwardly on our people in church? Of course not. We know this. The right answer is that we should labor with all our might for the gospel, work with people for their joy, keep a close watch on ourselves and the teaching, not grow weary in doing good, and continue on with endurance.

Before I tell you what happened that brought me out of this discouragement, I must ask you the question I am now even asking myself: What is your motivation as you labor in gospel ministry? Are you a results driven person? This is not to say that we shouldn’t desire or expect results. But they will come in God’s way, in His time. Let me ask it a different way. Do you labor that you might see results NOW, or do you labor in HOPE that God will build His kingdom, that He alone will cause growth in His way and time, and do you believe this verse- “Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.”? (1 Cor. 15:58)

This is something that I am beginning to internalize. One thing that encouraged me was the Scriptures. Looking at Isaiah’s struggle, and especially Paul’s own struggle in these areas, I’m encouraged to see how He pressed on. The other thing that encouraged/humbled me was a situation that arose with one of our family groups here at New Hope. A type of rebellion broke out. You see, each family group is responsible to work and grow a lot of their own food, and take care of their family compound area by keeping it hoed and clean and keeping the grass cut. They should go out every day for an hour or two to work, sometimes longer.  They hadn’t all gone to work in several weeks, and the kids were refusing to work. Without going into the details, these kids are dearly loved by their family father, and by the other workers here. They have poured into them for years. Now we find that they are backbiting and being very mean to those who love them.

I came by to see Keith one day to find him slashing on their compound, which is next to his house. He had been there all day. They were just sitting by, watching him and George, the family father, do their job. The natural consequence of their lack of work is that they would not eat until the work was done. So to show their love, and to disciple their hearts, they went to work slashing. Oh- if you don’t know, slashing is cutting grass with a slasher, which looks like a golf club. I get blisters every time I do it. What humbled me about their situation is that they have worked SO much harder than me in these kids lives, and they are getting open rebellion, not just lukewarmness.

So you know, that family is doing much better, and things are beginning to be dealt with, and healing is starting. But I came to see how small my discouragement was compared to their issues. I felt like such a whiner. My discouragement really was not that heavy, and it did not last long. Not a big deal. But I thought it worth probing into and dealing with so that when it comes in bigger ways later, I will have thought through it to some degree. Long explanation.

On to current events. I preached at the “mega church” this past Sunday, here at New Hope. It’s really just a couple hundred people, which is huge compared to the surrounding churches who usually max out at 50 people. They have been preaching through the Biblical storyline, and they allowed me to preach on the Exodus story. It went well! Thanks to all who prayed. Here are some difficulties I found: I felt very slowed down by the translator, because I wanted to go faster and establish a rhythm, but couldn’t. I was preaching on Genesis 1-15. Not an easy task. But I came out with a full manuscript, and only referred to it during my message. I had one good compliment from Moses, one of my family guys, who said that this was the first time in a while that he paid attention the whole time. I love the honesty.

I saw someone recording the sermon on his computer, so I hope to get a copy of it that I might critique myself more. But it really is difficult with a translator. It is very necessary of course. But I think if I were to end up in a foreign country like Uganda, where most people speak English(at least in the halfway educated parts- many of the villagers know very little English), I would have to be fluent in the common language, enough to preach in it.

Well, that’s all I have for today. I hope you have been encouraged, and I hope you will remember Christian that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. Keeping running the race with endurance, and allow God to take from you the glory that only He deserves. Keep laboring where God has placed you, and don’t slack off when you don’t see results. Cry out to Him and seek His face when you don’t know how to continue on, or don’t know how to make sense of a situation. He is faithful, and will show you the way if you dilligently seek Him.