Well, I made it! This is my last post for Uganda. On Friday I will head into the big city, where I will partner with a missionary who will let me tag along, and will put me to work for a few days. I’ll also be preaching on Sunday at one of his churches he works with. I fly out on Monday morning, and will touch down around 2:00 pm this coming Tuesday. I can’t believe it’s over! These last few days are sorrowful to leave, yet I am more and more feeling ready to go home.

This week we filled out an evaluation form which included many questions about what we learned. I typed it out, and I decided just to let you read that. It will give you a lot of insight into what I’ve learned and experienced during this time. It does not include everything, but there’s a lot there.  I’m answering a series of questions, so if you are pushed for time, just scroll to the different questions to get to the ones you really want to read. Or, if you have time and really do want to take in every detail(mom), feel free to read it all! But for those who have been supporting me here and are still reading this, I cannot thank you enough, and your invest in me I can say for sure will reap eternal results in my life and in the lives of those I minister to. I will be visiting FVBC and GBC, for those who are reading this from those churches, so I will see you all soon. Praise God for His great work! I’m so thankful to him.

I think I will do one more entry on Uganda some time next week when I get home, giving a few closing remarks and telling you what is next for me in greater detail, and describing my coming-home experiences. Here now is the evaluation. Enjoy!

 1. Why do you think God desired that you go through this training?

When I came here I did not have many expectations. I didn’t know what to expect. Basically, I came to have my eyes opened up to cross-culturally ministry. I came to have my worldview shaken up a bit, to see what it was like to live in a different culture, and to just allow God to use the time to do whatever he would do in my life. Now looking back, God certainly did all of these things, but He had even more things in store for me. I believe that God wanted me to go through this training for several reasons. First, he did it to show me that I am able to live in another culture comfortably. I have really gotten used to life here at New Hope, and I could go for much longer in this environment. I’m not dying to get home to the West. I feel that I have been able to interact with the people here successfully, adjust to a different way of life, and ponder how I can change and do ministry in the midst of that. Another reason he had me go through was to get a bigger heart for missions. I really do have a greater heart for this, and I see it as more of a possibility for my future. God wanted me to get this. The life of an overseas minister has become more clear to me what it is, and what it is really like. God also wanted me to understand things like racial reconciliation, to grow in my teaching ability, to get a snapshot of the small, struggling village churches, to get away from Western life and all that that entails, to get guys like Keith to do surgery on my soul, etc., etc. The other reasons will be made more clear in the following questions.

2. What is the most significant change in your life from when you first came here to who you are now? Why did this impact you as it did?

It’s hard to say exactly, but the first thing that comes to mind right now has to do with my own life calling, where God is leading me to serve Him. That’s been big on my thoughts the whole time, and many different things have contributed to this. I might just be saying this now because it’s the most recent things that has been on my thoughts. But my own life purpose has come to have much bigger and sharper meaning. I’ve known this, but it has become much more clear and focused for me. I exist to carry out God’s mission on this earth, to know and reflect His glory, and to broadcast His supremacy wherever He may put me. I have much more of a drive to do this when I get home, and in my future to live this out whether in mission or at home. This has to do with my thoughts on what things would be keeping me from leaving my country for missions. Many of my reasons for not going have been burned up when put up against my life purpose. The reason this impacted me is really a combination of the Institute, conversations with staff and others, being away from the West, and other things I can’t remember.

3. What are some of the other main things that have impacted your life as a result of your time studying in the Institute?

The racial reconciliation piece is something I will always remember. To see people freed from racism, unforgiveness for big hurts, and forgiveness of others was an amazing thing to see. It was big for me to see some of the effects that unforgiveness can have on people, and what a freeing thing it is to actually forgive and be free. My Western worldview was confronted in a few ways. Many of these ways I already knew were there. I know we have a lot of problems, and a lot of pride. But many of the things that were confronted had to do with secular American culture, which I as a Christian already acknowledged to be wrong, though the church in general has adopted many secular ideas from the culture. I have also learned to be gracious and patient with some of the teaching/teachers, partly due to content at times, and partly due to cultural/stylistic differences at other times.

4. Explain the effects that some of the other various teachings have had on you.

One thing has been how to live out the gospel in a poverty-ridden culture, such as in the villages. What is the right way to minister to them? People seem to fall on one of the two extremes, of either just preaching, or just feeding. What I came to on this is that we need to reflect the character of God wherever we are, which means serving physical needs, and speaking the message. Both. The physical ministry is not merely a MEANS to the spiritual, but is itself a part of living out who we are as Christians. Biblical manhood was good for me to think about. It really sharpened for me what it means to be a true man in my decision making, interaction with women, integrity in living, dilligence, etc. As it relates to the Fatherhood of God. I had a good father growing up, and I don’t feel that I really struggled to accept God as my Father. I think I have grown in this area, and have a much more biblical basis for how I would live as a spiritual father to others as a single man.

5. How have the truths that you have learned been playing out practically in your life? What truths are you going to seek to apply further and how?

It’s hard to work it out practically at the moment because I don’t feel that I have a really good context in which to live out these particular truths at the moment. What I feel it is doing is laying a foundation from which to live out these truths when I get home, or as I ponder future ministry to come. In the future, here are the things I will seek to live out. I should try to adopt spiritual children(physical someday perhaps as well) and bring God’s Fatherhood to those who don’t have it, especially to those who don’t have good father through which to mediate God’s Fatherhood to them. I really have a strong desire to reach out to the community in which I live. Another thing has been for me to live with a global heart for the nations. Whatever ministry I find myself in, I want to keep this in sharp focus.

6. What are some of the main things that have impacted your life as a result of living here (outside of class)? How have you been challenged and changed as a result?

The church has impacted my life, more from a need standpoint. I really have a heart to more work with the churches that remain inert, and want to mobilize them to reach their communities and beyond. I want to see God’s people worship BETTER, which is true in an American context as well. I’ve gone from being critical to being more understanding and really wanting to help. Along with the life calling issue, living in a different culture for a long period of time has been an impactful thing to me as well.

7. How has God used those you live with to impact or challenge you throughout the course?

It has been so good to share a place with Matthew. He has opened my eyes to a lot of Ugandan culture, giving me an “inside look” at a number of things. He has confirmed the truth of many things to me as well that are taught in class regarding different cultural things, and really has just brought reality to me. I can often just be in the clouds with the culture, and he will just tell me what people are really thinking, and what things are REALLY like. He’s been a good friend here as well. I have discussed so many issues with him, and I’ve come to respect His thoughts and opinions, as well as the struggles that come with living with a westerner.

8. How has God used the other students to challenge you?

Some students have challenged me in the area of just loving them. Some are hard for me to love, and God has convicted me in this area and really enabled me to change on this. I love seeing how the Africans worship and just love to sing His praise, and be engaged in it. I’ve really appreciated some of the struggles that my fellow students have had, and have been challenged by their openeness and humility in dealing with them. In the West, I think it would be much harder to dig out some of the issues because people are too concerned about looking good, staying reserved, not appearing to significantly struggle, and saving face. We had an environment here where we could be open, and be exposed. That is so valuable, and I’ve been really challenged by that.

9. How has spending time with a family been used to impact you? The children? What have you learned? What have been cultural challenges you have faced?

Working with Calvary family has been informative for me. Getting to know some of the kids, and becoming familiar with their lives and some of their struggles has been good for me to see, as well as being very challenging to deal with. It’s always a growing experience to enter a new ministry context where I have to build relationships. One thing I learned is that I couldn’t approach this type of thing that same way I would a group in the States. I couldn’t just sit down with them and talk, no matter how good it was. Relationship is so important here, and based on my time here, I found that I had to just work on the relational side first, and just live life with them. I found it hard to talk with them a lot, because, especially at the beginning, they didn’t trust me or know who I was. They warmed up to me later on, which was nice. I found that many of the children really aren’t showing any authentic Christian fruit, and many just go through the motions, and do the bare minimum to be accepted as a christian in this community. Confronting that in the future will be a challenge. It will take just a lot of time and effort to reach them; some real, dedicated, all-of-life discipleship is needed as the Spirit works on their hearts.

10. What have you learned from the family parents and other staff members?

From the family parents I’ve learned more just as it relates to children, as stated in the last question. I really appreciate and respect their job. I’ve learned quite a bit from the western staff in particular, because they are coming from my own context, and I have learned a lot as they deal with issues from a Western background in a culturally appropriate way. I’ve seen their patience and sacrifice in giving up their own culture, and it’s been good to see how real missionaries live, work, and think on the field. Especially good on this has been seeing the culturally difficulties that face westerners in this African context, and how that can be a draining, tough thing, which each of them has learned, and must continue to learn, how to deal with. Keith has also been a great mentor of sorts during my time here. He’s been a good sounding board for me, and has revealed a lot about my own heart and needs. I have fed off of his advice, and have learned a lot about family life from seeing how he leads his household.

11. What have you been challenged in and learned from the leadership of New Hope?

Jay has been one with an inspiring vision. I’ve learned more from what he has done than what he has said, same with Jonnes. I like that they both are firm in their convictions yet humble in their ideas, big in their visions, and God-centered in how they do things. They have humility in what they know they are gifted in and what they are not gifted in. So really, I’ve just seen good examples of leadership from these guys. The bigness of the vision. Also to see how they’re not trying to take over Uganda, or change the culture per se, or make a name for themselves, or get power, or be popular. These are not easy, and I’ve been most challenged in their example.

12. What will be the greatest obstacles that you will face upon leaving here that might hinder you ability to fully live out the things that you have learned? What can you do to prepare to face these obstacles?

I suppose another change that results from being away is a re-sensitization to materialism. Going back to the west it’s so easy to slip into that. One obstacle is worldliness. As I am again exposed to the media I can become dull to sin and it’s effect on my mind, heart, and affections. The other challenge will be to become consumed with America and the church there that I minimize the needs in other cultures, and especially minimizing my own duty in missions. In general, it will be the fact that I have changed, and I want to stay changed, and I need to put things in place that will allow me to do so. To face these obstacles, one thing I will do is, based on what I’ve just typed in the above questions, come up with some concise resolutions to live out when I get home, and remind myself of them regularly. I also need to stay up to date on what is happening gospel-wise in other countries, to keep my heart going out. Probably the greatest thing that will help me to live it out is my simply DOING it. As I begin doing it, it will more and more get into my system. You know it by doing it. So it will be a matter of setting patterns of outreach, patterns of discipline, and getting people around me who will push me forward in this area. As I establish a new life in Alabama, I will do my best to make it an environment conducive to powerful, outward gospel living.

13. If you could go back to when you first began the course, what would you change about yourself, your attitude, or your heart now in retrospect?

I had a lot of pride when I started. I was willing to learn, but grew impatient with a lot of the teaching and just HOW it was taught, rather than being patient, and really seeing how I could learn and help my colleagues. I knew a lot of the stuff taught. If I could change it, I would come in with the attitude of it being OK that I know a lot of this stuff, and I should just take the time to go deeper into them, and interact with them on more of a critical level. I feel like coming in it took time for me to let my guard down, and be real and open enough to let others work on me, to be vulnerable, be hurt, and be broken down that I might build a better house, rather than a facade. I think another way I have changed then is that I’m much more open about my weaknesses, and much more desirous to work on them with the help of others. I have played the hiding game, where I hide my sin, and think I’m doing fine, rather than being exposed and confronted, opening up that I might be truly fixed on the inside, not just look good on the outer layers.

It’s going to be interesting when I get home. I look forward to seeing many of you.

 

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 14th, 2007 at 3:17 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.